WWE RAW Review 4/2/12
Here’s Johnny! Laurinaitis is out, your new General Manager of RAW and Smackdown. He has some matches tonight, but he swears that he won’t abuse his power, like when the United States Champion Santino Marella defends his title against both Jack Swagger and Dolph Ziggler. CM Punk comes out, to have some words with Johnny Boy, still calling him a giant toolbox no matter how many shows he is on. A match is made with CM Punk putting the WWE Championship against Mark Henry.
The Rock is out, to talk about last night and gives Cena his props, saying that he took him to the limit last night, in an epic match. The Rock states that he had a vision of something, and it will happen, he will be the WWE Champion once more. Well that would be interesting, although I’m not sure how we’ll get there.
Recap of the match last night, with the Rock defeating John Cena.
Santino Marella retained the WWE United States Title over Dolph Ziggler and Jack Swagger
Santino managed to evade both men, in what was more or less a handicap match, with Ziggler being taken out and Cobra pins Jack Swagger. After the fact, Swagger and Ziggler try to beat down Santino Marella, but Brodus Clay saves Santino from a beating. Santino and Brodus dance, to conclude a rather fun segment.
Lord Tensai defeated Alex Riley
The return of the former Prince Albert/Albert/A-Train/Giant Benard, the man known as Lord Tensai makes his debut on RAW. Hey Alex Riley, welcome back from Superstars/NXT, don’t get too comfortable, you’re fodder. Tensai uses a huge power bomb to pin Riley. Then he punishes him more after the match.
Look at Sheamus after last night.
Recap of John Cena stressing that he needed to win.
Mark Henry defeated CM Punk via countout; Punk retains the WWE Championship
Well I did enjoy this one to be honest with you, and after Henry being slid down the card, he recoups just a little bit, dumping Punk to the outside for the countout. Punk keeps the belt because titles do not change hands on a countout or a disqualification Then after the match, Mark Henry destroys Punk with the World’s Strongest Slam. Chris Jericho is out to taunt Punk and bust a bottle of Jack Daniels over his head, so that feud must continue.
Sheamus cuts a promo but the long awaited return of Alberto Del Rio occurs, with Ricardo Rodiguez. Alberto and Sheamus go back and forth, with Sheamus and Alberto set up for Smackdown. Then Sheamus takes down Alberto Del Rio with the Brogue Kick. Ricardo does not get beaten up as per his contract. Daniel Bryan was the most over person during this segment, just saying.
Daniel Bryan refuses comment.
Kofi Kingston defeated Cody Rhodes
The Big Show pops up during this match to show Rhodes getting knocked out and Trouble in Paradise knocks him down for the pin.
Mark Henry is pitching up a storm when who should pop up is Abraham Washington. Yeah, remember that guy? He offers his services. He’s no Tony Atlas.
Eve is a manipulative shrew and she talks about how she says that she can have any many, except one, John Laurinaitis, he cannot be manipulated. Well if you believe…nah not going to go there.
The Miz defeated Zack Ryder
A pretty rocking match, even if Zack Ryder is slowly going back to being somehow lower on the totem pole than when he was a Superstars regular last year. That will teach ya to get over with the fans. Of course, he does have a lot of solid offense, but c’mon, it’s the Miz, who doesn’t have the best win loss record. Skull Crushing Finale gets the duke on Zack Ryder.
John Cena is out to talk about his loss to the Rock but he remains humble. Same old John Cena, he’s defeated, he’s humbled, he’s thanks the universe. After the past year, he gave it his all and rather simply came up short. He congratulates the Rock. Daniel Bryan is still the most over man. YES, YES, YESAnd then…HERE’S BROCK LESNAR, MOTHERF******! Brock Lesnar has returned to WWE and the fans are going nuts. I’m going nuts even though I knew it was coming. Lesnar comes out, does the Brock dance, and poses, Lesnar offers his hand as he enters the ring but it’s a swerve, F-5 puts down John Cena.
You need to watch WWE RAW 4/2/12 for Brock Lesnar.
WWE RAW Results 4/2/12
Santino Marella retained the WWE United States Title over Dolph Ziggler and Santino Marella.
Lord Tensai defeated Alex Riley.
Mark Henry defeated CM Punk via countout.
Kofi Kingston defeated Cody Rhodes.
The Miz defeated Zack Ryder.
Brock Lesnar returns.