Tuesday, May 1, 2012

WWE RAW Review 04/30/12

WWE RAW is live and in living color just twenty four hours after an insane Extreme Rules match, with John Cena triumphing over Brock Lesnar in an Extreme Rules Match but Cena may never be the same again. We have some insight into the mindset of John Cena tonight. Plus the Return of Beat the Clock to get a WWE Championship Title Match.

WWE RAW Review April 30th 2012

 Brock Lesnar is out to crow about his beating that he gave John Cena last night, but out comes Triple H to spoil the party. Triple H is voiding the huge contract that John Laurinaitis gave Lesnar. So Lesnar responds by voiding Triple H's ability to use his arm by punishing him with a Kimura. The babyface locker room are out but the damage has been done. A rocking way to start off RAW for this week, with more to come.

Eve Torres introduces the Beat the Clock Sprint, where whoever gets the fastest time gets a title shot.

The Miz defeated Santino Marella

The Miz lost to Santino Marella last night at Extreme Rules but avenges him in the Beat the Clock Sprint. Not too shabby, with the Miz picking up the obvious pin with the Skull Crushing Finale. 

Layla defeated Brie Bella and Nikki Bella in a Triple Threat Match

In the realm of pointless Divas matches over the last few years of RAW, this wasn't too bad, but a showcase for your new Diva's Champion, Layla, who picks up the pin.

Chris Jericho defeated the Big Show in the Beat the Clock Challenge

Jericho tries desperately to get another title shot but falls just short. He wins the match, taking down the Big Show via a countout. However, the important thing to realize is that he does most certainly not beat the clock. So tough luck for Jericho.

Brodus Clay defeated JTG

It is time for your weekly Funkasaurus Special here on RAW. This is not Beat the Clock, sadly. JTG falls like all over the others, to the big splash of death right from Brodus Clay. Funk is still on a roll on RAW and the Funkasaurus remains undefeated under that gimmick. Brodus brings some children in the ring to celebrate.

Eve and John Laurinaitis plot and plan backstage. Johnny Boy has a brain storm about John Cena's next opponent. The plot has thickened. I'm sure many were thinking come on Batista, but we were about to be let down.

Randy Orton pinned Jack Swagger to set a new time in the Beat the Clock Sprint

A pretty decent match, given that Randy Orton had four minutes to do this, he had pretty much no time to stall and the match improved. Orton just managed to get right in under the wire with the RKO and the Miz has lost out just barely, with Randy Orton now the man to beat.

Kofi Kingston and R-Truth defeated Epico and Primo to become the new WWE Tag Team Champions. 

Not like the tag team titles really mean much anymore, but this is a good match. Epico and Primo will likely go back to Superstars forever. Trouble in Paradise gets the win as we have new WWE Tag Team Champions. A.W. is out, to register his disappointment, saying that Epico and Primo could still have been champions if they signed up with him.

Kane and the Great Khali fought in the Beat the Clock Challenge Until the Time Ran Out

The epic Wrestlemania 23 rematch that the entire world has been waiting for. We had four minutes. It was not for the weak at heart. Kane destroys Khali after the fact. Orton still has the time to beat.

Daniel Bryan defeated Jerry Lawler in the Final Match in the Beat the Clock Sprint

YES! Daniel Bryan is your winner, winning with the YES Lock making Jerry Lawler tap out. So we've got CM Punk against Daniel Bryan for the WWE Championship. On Pay Per View. In WWE.

I'll let that glorious fact sink in.

John Cena is out, he won last night, but he is wrecked. But he is here. We have Cena talk, and he calls out John Laurinaitis who tells Cena that it would be in his best interests to build a working relationship with him. We get the next Cena Pay Per View feud against Johnny Boy himself. Boy that's a kick in the pants. Tensai is a false start and Johnny the Suit destroys Johnny the Cena. There's your Over the Limit Match.

A rather hot and cold edition of RAW this week, but the promise of Daniel Bryan and CM Punk is high.

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